very scared to give birth, can i get help?

saleave36

New member

hello every one

 

i am only 16 and i am already pregnant. i am 5 months pregnant but these days this crazy thought suddenly popped in my head and now i can't get rid of this. i am thinking about the moment when i'm going to give birth to my child.

 

i know every girl and woman is afraid of this but i am too afraid! i am so scared you cannot imagine! i am always questioning whether is it going to hurt so much or i can even die during those moments? how much time everything is going to be?? will my tail bone brake or how the baby is going to come out of me? i am not too young for this? how can i understand that my body is ready to give birth?

 

i found something on the internet but i want to know real answers. i mean i want to ask these questions women who already gave birth and they know everything, how it was, did you were scared too? and etc.

 

please i need this help because i'm very afraid that something might go wrong and might be wrong with the baby or me or something else. please someone have some mercy and ease my mind. thank you

 

HayleySutt

New member

hi salevea, i do know what are you talking about because i'm pregnant and i'm going to have my baby in about 4 months so i'm pretty scared when it comes to give birth too. everything has started when i asked my older friends about this who already gave birth and how they said it is going to be a hell. they told me that i should expect the worst pain i ever felt, a kind of pain that i never felt to be more exact and they added that they only prepare me for this and not trying to scare me out. how i should not be worried and scared when they told me things like this? they were telling me about labor contractions like they're going to be endless and how terrible it is going to be. when they finished their stories i was thinking that they told me some kind of scary story or something. i thought that this should be a beautiful moment but now i have totally changed my mind. however in the end they told me that every pain and bad moment i had find its relief once i will hold my little baby in my arms. this is good and i really hope this is the way it is going to be but anyway it scares me a lot. i haven't heard a birth story where the word "pain" isn't involved. i understand that i'm going to be in their places in about 4 months and i also do understand that there's no other way but i'm truly scared. each time when i have a "panic" like this i'm thinking that millions and millions years all women have been through this and i'm going to be too, i mean that there's nothing unhuman etc.

 

i can answer some of your questions: it is going to hurt and as i already said, i was told that a kind of pain that you never felt. yes, women can die while they were giving birth but i also know that if you're in a at least "average development country" you should worry about this. the time is different for each individual but i was told that it can last few hours. about the tail bone i haven't asked but i think it is only going to enlarge for a period of time and then it is going to come back in his place, or i don't know. i don't really know how you can understand that your body is ready for this but in my opinion since you got pregnant - your body is ready.

 

Eva123

New member

I already had my baby girl and I can tell you something: everyone is scared to give birth! I personally was scared too but I made through it, you will make it too, trust me! Of course you're going to be scared, everyone is scared to do something what they never did before especially when they know for sure that it is going to be painful, well it is going to be painful, I cannot deny that but I knew that I have thse pains for a purpose and when I got that little purpos in my hands I forgot about all the pains! You know that you're doing it for your baby so you don't really concentrate on the pain... Obviously there's no chance that you could avoid it or not to feel the pain but it is something human, everyone do it. Doing something that you haven't experienced is always scary, no? Remember your first time sex or the first time when you went to school. It was scary, at least for me it was. You may be scared but I recommend you not to stress yourself out, because it is not good either for you or your baby and moreover no matter what you have to make thru it and hopefuly it may not be as bad as you thought. It can really be because when I gave birth I thought it is going to be much painful than it was. Anyway I watched some horror movies and I think there is much moree pain than giving birth))) You'll be fine, you'll get through it, and you'll have your baby, I'm sure about that! You can ask a doctor, I think she is going to explain you everything in details) Good luck

 

Don’t be afraid! You’ll be just fine! I’m sure about that! I remember when I was giving birth to my son, my first and only child. He’s now 7 years old but I remember the day when I gave birth to him like it was yesterday! My water broke in my bed in the morning right after I woke up and was laying there. Even though those pains started I was very excited because I knew that soon I’ll keep look at my baby and I’ll kiss him. When the contractions started I was trying to be focused on the good part. What I would say about the contractions is that they are guiding your body to make your baby come out. Yes, the pains were intense but you know that it’s worth it, you know that it has a purpose so the pains are becoming not so terrible. I’ve heard that giving birth in a warm water it’s lessening the pains, I didn’t knew about it prior to give birth but I guess I will do it next time. Try different positions as soon as you feel the pains because in my case the pains were intensifying if I was lying down, especially on my back so it’s very important the position. Your body knows the best in which positions is most comfortable for you! It doesn’t matter how you feel better: seated, leaning over your hands and knees or I don’t know but you just have to stay in that position. You don’t have to worry because modern medicine is amazing and they will do everything so you and your baby to be fine! I’m sure that both of you will! Remember that, every woman who has a baby, I mean every mother, has gone through it and everything is OK. It is all natural so the mother nature help you to get through it too, I’m sure! With modern medicine, chances that both you and your baby will be alright are much higher than not being.  Good luck and I wish you a easy birth giving!

 

Goldie

New member

Oh well…. Giving birth is not the same for everyone. While someone had horrible pains with this process, for me it wasn’t painful whatsoever. I almost didn’t felt pains at all, I didn’t feel a thing and that’s why the docs had to tell me when to push and when to not. I was expecting something more painful. I was induced and then I was given an epidural right away as they started the Pitocin. Guess that’s why I never really felt a contraction when I gave birth. There was a thing that went pretty wrong as the cord got wrapped around my boy’s neck while he was inside of me and that’s why his heart rate was going down continuously. Moreover, he was facing up towards the ceiling but he had to face the floor so I could psh him out of me. Now I’m pregnant again with my second boy and this time I’m going into labor and have an epidural when it gets pretty close to the time that I have to push because I would want to feel something this time. Otherwise it doesn’t seem normal to me, or who knows? I would like to feel that I’ve made something, that I’ve accomplished it. I know that it sound pretty crazy but when you know that there should be some kind of pain and you don’t feel anything then you start thinking that you’re not normal. Like I think now… about the baby breaking your tail bone…? What a craziness? I never heard of that, none of my friends who got pregnant ever heard of that either. None of the docs to whom I talked ever told me that this can happen. I guess that even if there ever happened something like that the baby has to be a reaaaaally big one. Anyway, this happens very fast. Even thought for some women it is happening few hours, all of them said that it seems fast. You don’t really have time to think about something. For me the post part was the hardest because after you give birth everything is swollen and very very sore down there. You hardly can get you of your bed to go to the toilet at least for 3 days. At least, it was for me 3 days. Those days I was sitting in hospital and only later they delivered me home. Anyway, when you’re in the process you have to remember that the more you’re moving around the better you would feel. Well, docs would guide you when the time comes.

 
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